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Thread: Joke of the day

  1. #11
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    hahahahaha.Funny things come back smiles on our faces like



  2. #12
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    its funny. thanks for sharing

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    Default Football and the blonde...

    Out of all the blonde jokes, this one has to be the best!

    Football FINALLY makes sense...

    A guy took his blond girlfriend to her first football game. They had great seats right behind their team's bench. After the game, he asked her how she liked the experience.

    'Oh, I really liked it,' she replied, 'especially the tight pants and all the big muscles, but I just couldn't understand why they were killing each other over 25 cents.'

    Dumbfounded, her date asked, 'What do you mean?'

    'Well, they flipped a coin, one team got it and then for the rest of the game, all they kept screaming was: 'Get the quarter back! Get the quarter back!'

    I'm like...Helloooooo? It's only 25 cents!!!!!!!!!!!!


  4. #14

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    Another set of insurance-related jokes:

    1. Relaxing Weekend
    Getting away from their high-stress jobs, a couple spends relaxing weekends in their motor home. When they found their peace and quiet disturbed by well-meaning, but unwelcome, visits from other campers, they devised a plan to assure themselves some privacy.

    Now, when they set up camp, they place this sign on the door of their RV:

    "Insurance agent. Ask about our term-life package."


    2.Military Life Insurance
    Airman Jones was assigned to the induction center, where he advised new recruits about their government benefits, especially their GI insurance. It wasn't long before Captain Smith noticed that Airman Jones was having a staggeringly high success-rate, selling insurance to nearly 100% of the recruits he advised. Rather than ask about this, the Captain stood in the back of the room and listened to Jones' sales pitch.

    Jones explained the basics of the GI Insurance to the new recruits, and then said: "If you have GI Insurance and go into battle and are killed, the government has
    to pay $200,000 to your beneficiaries. If you don't have GI insurance, and you go into battle and get killed, the government only has to pay a maximum of $6000.

    Now," he concluded, "which group do you think they are going to send into battle first?"

  5. #15
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    Quote Originally Posted by insured™ View Post
    Another set of insurance-related jokes:

    1. Relaxing Weekend
    Getting away from their high-stress jobs, a couple spends relaxing weekends in their motor home. When they found their peace and quiet disturbed by well-meaning, but unwelcome, visits from other campers, they devised a plan to assure themselves some privacy.

    Now, when they set up camp, they place this sign on the door of their RV:

    "Insurance agent. Ask about our term-life package."


    2.Military Life Insurance
    Airman Jones was assigned to the induction center, where he advised new recruits about their government benefits, especially their GI insurance. It wasn't long before Captain Smith noticed that Airman Jones was having a staggeringly high success-rate, selling insurance to nearly 100% of the recruits he advised. Rather than ask about this, the Captain stood in the back of the room and listened to Jones' sales pitch.

    Jones explained the basics of the GI Insurance to the new recruits, and then said: "If you have GI Insurance and go into battle and are killed, the government has
    to pay $200,000 to your beneficiaries. If you don't have GI insurance, and you go into battle and get killed, the government only has to pay a maximum of $6000.

    Now," he concluded, "which group do you think they are going to send into battle first?"
    Hahaha I love the 2nd one here.

  6. #16
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    A married couple was asleep when the phone rang at 2 in the morning. The very blonde wife picked up the phone, listened a moment, and said 'How should I know, that's 200 miles from here !' and hung up The husband said, 'Who was that?'

    The wife answered, 'I don't know, some woman wanting to know if the coast is clear.'

    Bambi, a blonde in her fourth year as a UCLA Freshman, sat in her US Government class. The professor asked Bambi if she knew what Roe vs. Wade was about.

    Bambi pondered the question; then, finally, said, 'That was the decision George Washington had t o make before he crossed the Delaware .'

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    During a recent password audit, it was found that a blonde was using the
    following password:

    MickeyMinniePlutoHueyLouieDeweyDonaldGoofySacramen to

    When asked why such a long password, she said "she was told that it had
    to be at least 8 characters long and include at least one capital ."

  8. #18
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    An American T-shirt maker in Miami printed shirts for the Spanish market which promoted the Pope's visit. Instead of the desired 'I Saw the Pope' in Spanish, the shirts proclaimed 'I Saw the Potato.

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    Business trip

    Sally was driving home from one of her business trips
    in Northern Arizona when she saw an elderly Navajo
    woman walking on the side of the road.

    As the trip was a long and quiet one, she stopped the car
    and asked the Navajo woman if she would like a ride.

    After a bit of small talk while resuming the journey, the
    Navajo woman noticed a brown bag on the seat next to Sally.
    "What's in the bag?" asked the woman.

    Sally looked down at the brown bag and said, "It's a bottle of wine.
    I got it for my husband."

    The Navajo woman was silent for a moment then speaking
    with the quiet wisdom of an elder said, "Good trade."


  10. #20
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    Quote Originally Posted by xrac View Post
    During a recent password audit, it was found that a blonde was using the
    following password:

    MickeyMinniePlutoHueyLouieDeweyDonaldGoofySacramen to

    When asked why such a long password, she said "she was told that it had
    to be at least 8 characters long and include at least one capital ."
    Now that's a blonde! Nice sense of humor

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